Have You Ever Been Pregnant?

I went to the ER this morning after having a fever for about 7 days, experiencing a sore throat, and having trouble breathing. While my vitals were being taken, the nurse asked me some questions. "Do you suffer from anxiety?"..."Have you ever been pregnant?"

Me: "No."

Nurse: "Have you been exposed to anything?"

Me: "My son had strep a few weeks ago."

Nurse: "Wait...but you said you've never been pregnant..."

Yes, and I have two boys...they are six months apart- try to figure that one out:).

Ok, I didn't say that last line, but if I was healthier and my brain was working a little faster, I might have!

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You know, I feel incredibly blessed to be a mom to my two boys and to be honest, I have never really had THAT strong of a desire to experience pregnancy or labor/birth. That's not to say that adoption doesn't have its own emotional labor pains...some, I might argue that are more painful than physical labor, but I can't really comment on that because I have not experienced physical labor.

Anyway, despite the fact that I do not grieve the lack of experience of pregnancy....there are moments that I grieve the years and months and days that I missed of (A)'s life.

While waiting in the ER, I was reading this book:



(A) has been having a tough time in school and when I read these paragraphs, I was reminded of how great an impact those first three years of life have on a child.

"But whether adopted or not, any child may experience stressors such as abuse, neglect, or trauma, prenatally or during the first years of their lives. The most damage or benefit is realized during the first 36 months of a child's life, during which time the human brain develops to 90% of its adult size. This is also the time when the brain builds the systems and structures that will lay down future tracts for social, emotional, behavioral, and intellectual responses."

"It is important to note that when a child experiences significant neglect, holes are created in the brain, interfering with a child's ability to think consequentially. The beauty is that these holes can be healed (over time) through restorative and regulated relationships with parents who are calm, peaceful, and committed. This peace comes from more than just an emotionally healthy life. Ultimately, it comes through Jesus Christ our Lord. As He promises in John 14:27, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid."


This was eye-opening to me. Please pray for Lee and I...that we can provide the calm, loving example that (A) needs in order to experience that peace.